New layout: From Under The Duvet..: November 2006

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Well... It'll be interesting to get that mark back considering half of the philosophy essay wasn't actually covered in class.
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Geography tomorrow afternoon. Have revised for half of it. Haven't started revising human geography. I am so completely zonked.
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At psychology class tonight we were looking at the theories surrounding aggression. My psychology teacher said "...this just demonstrates that this kind of thing can still happen in civilised society. Well, America anyway..." Apologies to all my American friends - I love you guys dearly!

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Tuesday, November 28, 2006

First exam tomorrow..

So, naturally, I spent a large part of today tidying my den!
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But then I decided I should really start revising for RS tomorrow and I decided to write out an essay on the Ontological Argument for the existence of God - from which I can write and learn an essay plan.
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I want a time machine. I want to travel back in time and slap Immanuel Kant with a kipper. Really. As far as I can see his argument against the Ontological Argument reads something like: it has rained in town X every Tuesday in December since time began, it will rain in town X on Tuesday 5th December, therefore I can conclude the moon is made of cheese and the Clangers are real.
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Seriously, that's what his argument sounds like! As does Malcolm's! He waffles lots and coming (kind of logically) to the conclusion that evither God's existence is impossible or necessary. He clearly couldn't be assed writing an actual conclusion to his book so he just states "Therefore, God's existence is necessary".
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RAR!
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Anyway, I also revised Jesus and the political and religious authorities so I hope that is the question in the New Testament part of the paper. I am very proud of my notes for this topic. Five unlined A4 pages that have different coloured writing.
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Blue means a point. Purple is a quotation from a scholar. Turquoise is that scholar's name. Green is a Biblical quotation. I love Pilot Hi-Tecpoint V5 Extra Fine pens and I have this pen in seven (yes, seven) colours. Although I do feel a desperate need for the pink one - so it will be purchased Saturday week when I'm next in Belfast and can pop into Edco.
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I am going to go to bed now. It is so cold (or I am so cold) that I am sleeping in my sleeping bag under my 15 tog duvet. Seriously. I don't think the heater in my room works!
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Night night crew.

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Sunday, November 26, 2006

Quote of the Day Goes To...

"The Elims have falbs but we have balloons!"

This was said at the youth service tonight after everyone in the church started blowing up balloons to put in two volunteers' XXXL clothes (ie they put on XXXLarge Sweats on top of their regular clothes). It was a good night.

Today. Rugby. Fantastic! What a way to say goodbye to international rugby at Lansdowne Road! Awesome game - oh how I love you all!

MUST start revising! First exam on Wednesday afternoon.

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Saturday, November 25, 2006

Just One More Post Before Bed...

ATTENTION!
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ALIENS ARE COMING TO ABDUCT ALL THE GOOD LOOKING AND SEXY PEOPLE. YOU WILL BE SAFE, I'M JUST POSTING TO SAY GOODBYE.
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Love you all.
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PS - Bowman, the commandments say thou shall not steal..

Driving

Driving along the road Lady Dixons Park is on tonight and some jerk pulled out in front of me with all of an inch to spare. The essence of what I said was "you're kidding me". But I'm not saying that's the exact phrase I used...
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Still no revision done. I've no idea what I done today. Well, actually I do. But that's another story..

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Thursday, November 23, 2006

What I Need...

Is someone with a big pokey stick who will sit and poke me when I'm not doing work I really need to be doing!
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That would have meant non-stop poking from when I got up from a nap (there is no one who can nap like I can! Sleeping at night is an issue - but I nap because I don't sleep!) around 6pm to now. And they'd still be continuing beacuse I'm still procrastinating (by writing this!).
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Will this madness ever end?
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Sunday, November 19, 2006

Lots of Updates Recently!

So, I’ve updated quite a bit recently – three times yesterday! Can you tell I’ve a To Do board full of tiny writing to squeeze in everything I’ve to do? Can you tell I’ve mocks starting Monday week? Yeah, this year we’re going to put them under “what happens when you do rather little revision”…
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This morning was the GB and BB enrolment. This year I was sitting with the Anchor Boys. Always fun! Of course, a boy from my pew needed to go to the toilet! And once he wanted to go, another did! I was enrolled as a sub-officer (along with Rose, Christa, Leane, Amy and Hannah) – which now means I have gold braiding on my jumper. I’m rather convinced if I wore a skirt as short as my GB skirt to church any other week of the year I’d be the talk of the village!
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I aimed to do homework this afternoon. I did a little. Very little! Instead, I watched the wonderful Ireland play Australia. Now, they were without Mr Andrew Trimble, who will forever be my favourite. But, they won!! They beat Australia! So amazing guys – so proud of you!!
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I was very challenged but encouraged with a sermon delivered tonight by a girl raised in one of the families (her dad was my favourite Bible class teacher - the one I had as I became a Christian and started thinking deeper) in my church who moved away to England and as returned to become a minister.
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To be honest, when we read the Bible reading (Joshua 22:1-12) I was thinking “what sort of sermon could be based on this passage?” (Sorry!). But it was a really good sermon – based on the entirety of chapter 22. It was about the Israelites remembering their unity as people who serve the one God – something which is important in the world wide church – and about remembering you belong to God. Correct me if I’m wrong in that summary.
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In place of the flowers on the communion table there was a little mound of stones, which represented the altar in the story. At the end the congregation were invited to come and take a stone from that little pile to remind ourselves to be faithful to God. I have it sitting just above my computer screen here now – I figure I spend most of my time up in the den, here at the computer so it’s a good place to put it.
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It was a really good sermon on a weekend when I fell down - I've been trying to give up something and I'd done a whole week without it. But back again today. So I am feeling a little down about that. But God is good and His grace restores me – I’m trying to focus on the fact I’ve conquered a week without this thing I can do more.
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Anyway, I feel I should tell you to expect few blog posts as life gets crazy due to exams. However, I feel my amount of blogging will increase!
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Hope you all have a good week!
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Saturday, November 18, 2006


I got my painting today. It's called Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. But I need a name for the cow! I think it's probably more of a boy than a girl, but all suggestions welcome!
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I quite like "Aaron" at the moment.
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In other news - I drove home from Belfast from the Spires centre on my own! And then from a bar near Drumbo sort of area back into Belfast (along the Malone Road, Botanic, past Queens) etc on my own, in the dark that time! How scary - especially for my second time out on my own!

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Sorting the Geeks from the Cool People

Descartes walked into a bar and ordered a pint. The barman served him and said that it would be £3.50. Descartes said "I think not" and disappeared...
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I will admit it is a lame joke... But if you get it you will gain access to the Geek Group. If you don't get it, Google Descartes and try to find something he is famous for saying...

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New Account

So, I have now switched to the new version of blogger - before I'm made to! I guess we'll see how cool it is!

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Wednesday, November 15, 2006

You know it’s a bad day when…

…you get up and it’s raining...
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…you don’t want to get out of bed
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…you spend the first period after choir in common room, the second in the library and the third in common room and stand up to go and do your prefect duty at break time you realise you should have been in English last period!
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It turns out my English teacher asked where I was (because he’d seen me earlier) and, after the possibility of me smoking behind the mobiles was ruled out (ew, gross! And it was raining, so it was ruled out!) and one guy said he thought he saw me walking into common room, concluded I’d simply forgotten. I turned up for the period after break and the teacher didn’t say anything, so I didn’t. I handed in my essay he collected in. He read it while we were sitting there and though the first paragraph was so good he read it out! I think I have redeemed myself!
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…your prefect duty requires you walking outside in the rain to the canteen at break and lunch (yup, it was still raining!)
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…you’re on sick bay cover duty for a period (35 minutes) – and you get three people in in the first five minutes – we couldn’t strap the first boy’s fingers together and sent him back to class, we gave the girl a slightly defrosted ice pack but it was the coldest we had, and there is no way you need to sit in sick bay because of a “sore throat” (his voice and pronunciation was perfect!) but we let him sit there anyway – poor guys, if they don’t have their homework done they can’t go to sick bay with no questions asked like girls can (within reason!).
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…you have a psychology test and just can’t concentrate
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…it’s dark before school is out!
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…it’s still raining when school is out!
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…the fuse does that icky thing it does that means you get plunged into darkness
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…it’s still raining when going to psychology
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…you run out of time in the test
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…the class laugh at you when you tell them Monsters Inc. scares you because your parents repeatedly told you there were monsters in your wardrobe when you were little. To this day I can’t sleep if they’re even a little tiny bit open and if I’ve watched a scary movie I think the character is sitting in the wardrobe!
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…it’s raining when you get out of class so your mum says she wants to drive home – I’m hoping to go out on a drive on my own (to Ballygowan or something just!) before the preformal tomorrow night.
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Hmm… So the whole joy thing is working out! Tehee! No, it is. A little. I’ve just had one of those days. I did receive a lovely cheque in the post and late last night I checked my email to find I received an offer for choice #4 of Aston, conditional on BBB. And I’m so glad my driving test was yesterday – I hate driving in the rain! I’m always rather worried the window wipers will hypnotise me or lull me to sleep!
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But, due to the rain I’m considering hibernating!
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Hope you’ve all had a reasonable day…!

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Tuesday, November 14, 2006

So, I said I had important things...

And I did. Today. Today I had my driving test - and I passed! I got four minors (you're allowed fourteen)! So, yeah - I've got R plates now and they're up in the car. Don't know when I'll go out on a little run up to Saintfield on my own though - I'm either busy or the car's not here!
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Now the real process of learning to drive begins, I guess...
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Watch out if you see a wee focus running about!

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Sunday, November 12, 2006

My Head and My Heart

This is probably going to be one huge, disjointed and confusing post about my weekend but here it goes…



Firstly, my party was good. The film which we watched, called The Break Up, was not. I wouldn’t recommend it. In some romantic comedies you really don’t notice that there are only two properly known characters, in this film you really really did. If that makes sense. And it was just not great. I was constantly looking at how long had went – never a good sign!



A couple of posts ago (I can’t find which one!) I said that I was trying to stop doing something. It had been going ok, I was dealing with it better than I usually do. Then, at the weekend I fell. And I fell hard. On Saturday I was talking to a friend and they were giving me advice and saying just to move on and I was like “no, I don’t want to move on I want to do x, y and z (none of which were very helpful courses of action) and just feel like I’ve screwed up again because I have.” I can be so bitchy when I want to be!


But I know, and I told the friend, that I knew they were right. And that I was listening to them but I needed to hear it. Does that make sense? I know deep down that I have a great self worth – God sent His only Son to die for me and my screw ups – but part of me is just… I know God is a God of Grace and He will pick me up after falling so far but I am good at feeling a little "what is the point when I will inevitably screw up again?"

Tonight there was a question night which was with the other local Presbyterian youth group. And Paul was one of the people on the panel. During the night the panel were asked to tell a little about their testimony and something Paul said really resonated with me. He said that he knew all about Christianity in his head – but not in his heart. That’s a little bit like my story – I could quote verses (or at least give the idea of them) on things like, taking my earlier example, self worth – but I failed to make that connection with me and it didn’t sink into my heart.


Last night Mannafest was on. Jayne came along (that rhymes) and it was a good night. The guy was talking about joy. About how Christians should always be joyful because, regardless of whatever is going on God sent His Son to die for them etc. And, to be honest, even typing that is a little nauseating. I’m thinking “argh! That’s rather happy clappy!” But, it should be true.


I am really good at moaning at God (and people too). I am. But I am actively going to try to stop going “bah humbug” with God. Or at least be thankful and joyful about what he does do for me. At Mannafest those statistics of “if you have money in the bank, in your wallet and in a little dish somewhere in your house/if you had breakfast, lunch and dinner today/if you can read this…” you’re ahead of x number of people. So, I’m going to try that out, too.


Ok, so, having outlined all what I think tonight I feel a little despondent that I’m going to fail miserably by Tuesday. But, I’m going to try. I was talking to a friend tonight about it all and we’re going to actively try to encourage one another in this for ten days. Ten days seems small in the great scheme of things but I know that it’ll be tough enough! After those ten days I’m hoping that the fact of ten days will be long enough to keep me going in the wider scheme of things.

Prayers would really be appreciated this week – I should have done more for the week this weekend than I have (already – it’s Sunday and I’m behind!) – and I’ve a few big things going on this week that I could use some (a lot!) of prayer for.

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Friday, November 10, 2006

I spoil you guys

Three posts in less than three days! Lucky you guys!
Just to let you all know I got a conditional offer into applied psychology at Cardiff - conditional on me getting three A grades. Just wanted to let you all know - now I can enjoy my party without stressing! Speaking of which... I better run!!

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Thursday, November 09, 2006

Good and Bad

So, 18. An adult. More responsible. Apparently!



It’s been a mixed day.



I’d a geography test – bleurgh. I really ran out of time, but I guess it’s better to run out of time in November, rather than June! And I’ve two more mocks coming up soon – which I should get the full amount of time needed to do the paper!



UCAS… I thought, as I logged in to check my email, "wouldn't it be just wonderful to get an offer from Cardiff on my birthday..." and I got an email saying my UCAS had changed.. Sadly, not the way I'd hoped…



I applied to Cardiff for applied psych and then decided to slot in a Cardiff back-up of normal psych too - applied psych is definitely my preference but I needed a sixth choice basically. Well, I've been "unsuccessful" in my quest for normal psychology. I'm hoping they're saying "we won't accept you for both psych and applied psych, so we'll reject you for psych and you can come and be wonderful for applied psych" - especially as I've booked flights to go and visit them!!! It would be pretty icky for them to say "come and visit" only to reject me...



So, it sits now:
Applied Psych at Aston – not heard back
Psych at Queens – not heard back
Applied Psych at Cardiff – not heard back
Psych at Cardiff – rejected/unsuccessful
Applied Psych at Canterbury - they want me
Applied Psych with Clinical at Canterbury – they want me



Ultimately, I know I'll go where I need to be/where God wants me to be but prayers would be appreciated that I would accept whatever this may mean...



My dad’s friend died today – he was 75. He survived two open heart surgeries. Went into hospital and as soon as he cleared whatever it was he had up, he got something else and so it went on. He then got leukaemia – but the doctors remained positive and said he’d be home by Christmas. He died today at lunch time.



Some of you may know that this time last year was kinda hard on my family. My granny, my dad’s mum, got a lot weaker in the week around my birthday. I had my birthday party on the Friday night (my birthday was the Wednesday) and on the Saturday 12th at around 4-7am my granny died - so she died three days after my birthday. My aunt (dad’s sister) came up and sat me down. A couple of years ago my granny asked my aunt to buy my 18th birthday present – it’s basically a key (I think they’re called French Keys now), sprayed black on a red ribbon – upholding the tradition of being given a key to the house on your 18th/21st. It’s just made me a little teary I guess - as my friend has just said "that's so so lovely of her".



Anyway… Enough of the sad!



I think the funkiest present goes to Rose! She got me pretty wellies!! They’re so cute – they’re pink and red with hearts and stuff! I’ve been given the challenge of wearing them to church one rainy night! Rose, you and I are going out in a walk in the rain soon!



You may remember about the cow painting I saw in Cardiff. Well, Bradbury Graphic got them in – and I got it!! My mum/mum and dad got it for me. Sadly, I don’t have it yet – the artist is coming over to NI on the 18th so will sign it for me and I’ll get to meet her.



My friends weren’t too bad in school today – they did try to get the music teacher in charge of choir to announce it. Despite writing it down, he forgot.



At lunch time I’d the feeling something was going on because Claire dragged me around this really weird way – we went and wished happy birthday to the tree who had its birthday today and she wouldn’t let me go in to common room. She went into check something and I dived into the library opposite. Rose came in looking for me, asked the librarian if she’d seen me (I was sitting right behind Rose’s back…) and the librarian lied for me! Although then she went out and told them…



They’d got a cake (fair enough, I did that to Rose) – but they’d candles. Oh, but not just any candles – those silly ones that never ever blow out! They had to be pinched!!



But, thanks Rose – you’re a star!




Quote of the day:
"So, do you feel older? 'Cause you look like crap" "Umm.." – I’m hoping she was joking…



I decided to make some resolutions for the coming years. One of them was to be more open to the fact that God is in control and to be more submissive to Him and His Will – I have been really challenged on a few things recently but really struggle implementing stuff to do with them!



Another is to be more assertive – now, I have no issue telling people how I feel some of the time – and when I told Marty this in the office today I got a funny look! But sometimes I have major issues saying “no” and this can lead to me feeling totally overwhelmed! So, I’m going to try and find a nice way to say “erm... I’m busy”. I do four A levels, I’m at church about eight hours a week – three evenings, plus morning church (not that I’m complaining!). My fourth A level takes up four hours on a Wednesday evening. And I hear there’s this cool thing called a social life too…



So, my birthday round up. Thanks to everyone who wished me a happy birthday – I got too many messages to reply to them all!! I should have really made buns for tomorrow night! And I need to have a shower before bed! Eek!! Now, I’d have really liked Bernard’s Watch…

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Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Love

The Chimney Sweeper
(Songs of Innocence)


When my mother died I was very young,
And my father sold me while yet my tongue
Could scarcely cry " 'weep! 'weep! 'weep! 'weep!"
So your chimneys I sweep & in soot I sleep.



There's little Tom Dacre, who cried when his head,
That curl'd llke a lamb's back. was shav'd: so I said
"Hush. Tom! never mind it, for when your head's bare
You know that the soot cannot spoil your white hair."

And so he was quiet & that very night,
As Tom was a-sleeping, he had such a sight!
That thousands of sweepers, Dick, Joe, Ned or Jack.
Were all of them lock'd up in coffins of black.



And by came an Angel who had a bright key,
And he open'd the coffins & set them all free;
Then down a green plain leaping, laughing, they run,
And wash in a river. and shine in the Sun.



Then naked & white, all their bags left behind,
They rise upon clouds and sport in the wind;
And the Angel told Tom, if he'd be a good boy,
He'd have God for his father & never want joy.



And so Tom awoke; and we rose in the dark.
And got with our bags & our brushes to work.
Tho' the morning was cold, Tom was happy & warm;
So if all do their duty they need not fear harm.


I can be quite picky in what I like. There’s one particular area I am really picky in. In the last couple of years I’ve only really liked two people in this area. I just love listening to them and what they have to say. Sometimes they can be a bit confusing but not necessarily in a bad way…



So, any ideas what I’m talking about?



I am, of course, talking about poets!



Yeah, it took me a while to find any poet I could say I liked! A long time! But, when I was doing my GCSEs (gosh… so long ago!), I fell in love with Robert Frost – I even bought a book with all/most of his poems from the coolest bookshop in Belfast (No Alibis).



Now, I find myself in love with William Blake – which is good, I’ve a feeling I’ll need to be reminded of this love as he is responsible for a third (or maybe a sixth..) of my English lit A2 syllabus!


He just seems to have a really cool way of looking at things. In this poem, for example, religion is addressed (a common theme), as is childhood (again, a common theme).



The last line “So if all do their duty they need not fear harm.” can be read ironically. It’s the idea that people who have religious beliefs can sometimes be a bit ‘sure, it doesn’t matter what we do about –whatever- because everything will work out ok in the end and we’ll go to heaven where if you’ve had a horrible time in this life it’ll be rewarded etc’.



This idea sometimes gets me through days where I just feel like nothing is going right and I’ve nothing to look forward to ever again. I feel comforted by the fact that God is in control and that there’s some form of purpose to it all.



However, it can also lead to a less positive thing. Lethargy and inactiveness. Think about it, if everything in pre-destined or whatever, sure, what’s the point in really doing anything?



My old English teacher (the one I had for my GCSEs) is a local politician (for the Green party) and he wrote an article on George W Bush (and, no, not a “isn’t he wonderful?” article) – I really wish I could find a copy of it and read it! But, basically, it said that Bush believes that the world has to be destroyed before Christ will return – so why bother with silly things like the Kyoto agreement if runaway carbon emissions are just going to speed up the destruction?



I think this is a totally irresponsible point of view! As my old geography teacher repeated on what seemed like a daily basis “The earth is leant to us in sacred trust – we must look after it for our children”.


I admit, I am not the most Kyoto-friendly person – but I’m trying! Every little counts.



Anyway... well done America! So proud of you! Not only was there an abnormally high turn out but one house has a democrat majority and the other is borderline – two independent, forty-nine republican, forty-eight democrat with Virginia still up for grabs - the democrats got 8000 (0.3%) more votes in the first count and the recount result is pending.



Anyway… just one hour of childhood left… Hmm… The big bad adult world awaits… Wish me luck! (Especially in the geography mock I’ve got tomorrow!)

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Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Mid Term Elections...

Come on, Americans, we know you can be clever and we have faith that you are all out at polls today making the right decision..

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Sunday, November 05, 2006

A Public Declaration...

I now understand Wittgenstein - even his picture theory of represention (well, it is the bit I undertand least, but I still get it) - and anti-realism!!!

In the topic of religious language I understood Aquinas virtually straight away and walked out of class understanding logical positivism (both verification and falsification). We don't really look at myths, symbols or metaphors (given that you have a choice in an exam we just learn a few topics well enough to write about whichever two we choose) but I was struggling with Wittgenstein and anti-realism.

But now, after lots of sitting down and re-reading stuff five times over, I understand it. Woot!!! (I've found it helps to do it first thing when you wake up, or having a nap first!)

However, I think our next topic is the ontological argument... Which doesn't look like wee buns...

And now, having cleared three things of my to-do list (yes, so I skivved off church), I'm off out on a walk with Rose!

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Friday, November 03, 2006

A Recommendation

If you live in Northern Ireland watch The Blame Game on Friday nights. If you do not live in Northern Ireland visit here and watch The Blame Game on Friday nights. I LOVE this show. This show makes me laugh for 30 minutes on a day I got only 3 of 15 points on my To-Do list done – that is good going!
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In the programme five comedians get together – the presenter is Da from Give My Head Peace – and they discuss who is to blame for things in the world.
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I don’t know how it came up, but the Stern Report was discussed. One of the comedians said something like this:
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“The report said that deforestation and increased carbon emissions will lead to rises in sea levels which could mean in –however many- years the Irish cities of Dublin, Cork, Wexford and –somewhere else- will have disappeared. Blair said it was an awful situation and the Taoiseach said something must be done. Iain Paisley was unavailable for comment – he was out in Tollymore Forest cutting down all the trees with a petrol chainsaw”.
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Utterly priceless – watch it!

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Holding Hands At Pashendale

Last night I went to the Lyric Theatre to see Holding Hands At Pashendale by Martin Lynch. I was given the recommendation to go and see it by one of my English Literature teachers. The subject of the synoptic paper we're doing is War Literature. It was a great play - not what I expected but in a very good way! And I was sitting beside the BBC Newline News Presenter - Noel Thompson.
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I now want a copy of the script of the play but I can't find one! If anyone sees one or finds it let me know!
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Today I realised how much work I have to do over half term... And I've finally started it!! Eek! Oh well, I only ever really work under pressure - and I really needed a good little break - to remember what sleep is and such.
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I received a letter yesterday from Cardiff - it wasn't an offer (they said UCAS would get in touch shortly) but they want me to come and visit. So, the flights have been booked - I will miss my psychology class because it's a Wednesday night but it will be nice to have a specific look at the psychology department and to just see Cardiff again.
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I hope you all have a great weekend!

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Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Today (Hallowe'en)

Today I ....
  • went to a deaf and hard of hearing awareness course - it was really interesting, something I hope to pursue further. Apparently I was really good at lip reading and my finger spelling is quick and acurate... I didn't say that was a method of communicating through church or when teachers (Mr Peacock..) said "No talking".. fools...

  • I went to Rachel Conner's Hallowe'en party - I went as a devil (others stated that I am all year I just am open with it one night a year...) in my pretty red dress which I haven't wore since the wedding on July 4th!

And the big news for today....

  • I got two offers!! Both for Canterbury. But they said they only really accept AAA on the open day - both my offers were for ABB/AAC - yay! Not my first choice but I'm over the moon!

I have more news but it will wait...

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